Okay. Just calm down Aratis. It doesn't look like it's going to hurt me...
Unless it's trying to crush me with it's mind! Or maybe it's going to throw that rag which is no doubt infected with some virus that can somehow infect machines at me. Or maybe that cane can shoot lasers! Or maybe it-
Oh. Oh boy.
Wait. It asked for my name.
I am? I am, i am, i am...Aratos.
Er...Aratis...
...Please don't hurt me!
(Three and a half decades of this and by far, this encounter is yet the most bizarre.)
Greeting... "Aratis". And, as he has said, no one hear has any intention of causing the slightest bit of harm.
We're merely in... a predicament.
Wait, why don't we ask them for help? I'm sure they've wound up here for some reason. Might as well make the most of it, right?
That's absurd. They obviously have no idea what's going on. Then again... The more help, the merrier. I just wonder how things are doing on Master Wario's end.
Warimobile! Activate aerial formation!
Bombs away!
Piece of cake!
Isn't (ow) This-a (ow) move (ow) used (ow) by-
I'm-a sorry, Stanley, but you're-a outnumbered. Give-a it up. We can still talk about-a this-
NO! I don't wanna hear it! You two had the spotlight for FAR too long! It's MY turn now!
Once I defeat you two, I will take your role as heroes! I will save the lovely Princess Peach! And then, the whole entirety of the Mushroom Kingdom will owe me a favor... One I shall use to put that fiend, Donkey Kong Sr., BACK in the Zoo where he belongs!
...Stanley... I'm-a sorry, but you're wrong. Donkey Kong Sr. belongs on DK Island, his home... Don't-a make the same mistake I made-
Mistake!? He KIDNAPPED Pauline! He RUINED my Greenhouse! Don't think for a darn SECOND that criminal doesn't belong behind bars of some kind!
Stanley, please. I used to have-a thought that too. But I-a learned. I-a moved on. And I think-a you should move on, too.
...I can't move on, Jumpman. There is nothing for me to move on to.
(Oh ho ho... no no no no... OHOHOHOHOH...)
Huh wha? Nothing... well... where do you wanna go first?
(...)
(d-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! HA HA HA Hwagjh dadjfhwu... *hard inside wheeze* HAHAHAHA HAAAA!)
All right, who do we have to ask to sign the paperwork?
This seems... awfully familiar...
Wahahah! Waluigi number o--
Ha! That's what you get for calling yourself number o-- I MEAN WALUIGI!!!
Ouch. Those were no normal pieces of ammo, that's for sure.
You gonna be alright?
I'll be fine! Someone as magnificent as myself would have to!
If you say so. But whatever attacked us...
Intruders found. "Wario" and "Waluigi".
...You will be warned once. Leave and do not return. Any refusal will result in your elimination.
Karma's a B, eh, Wario?
Oh, shut up!
N-noooooooooooooo...
................................
(Paper)
*Points*
(h e l p)
Mommy!
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