What the-!? Did that rat steal my soul gem!?
Like my wallet!
And judging how there's other recent victims here too, you're not the only that's being looted.
WHAT!??!
And I'm supposed to believe that? Give me one good reason to trust you after what you've done!
...Where's my gun?
Some tree toppers, a ring, a gemstone, a wallet, and a gun. An assortment of petty thefts, all caused by multiples of a small humanoid.
And then, what of myself? I, too, had something stolen from me, just not by the hands of a "rat". Rather, it was circumstances that has stolen my opportunity.
An event finished as soon as it begun, I was removed from that situation and left to try and find something else to do with my time... Little did I know, I'd find it in the middle of a drink.
...All in all, things are about to get very interesting. Very interesting, squawk.
...So. Who else wants to go catch a rat?
Well theres a cave under here that's full of them....you've dealt with these creatures before right?....Could I have some help getting my stars back?...Especially if they have a gun....who brings a gun into a bar?....
Any help would be greatly appreciated. Especially from someone who's clearly a....detective? bird? automaton?
I can take you to where I found the hideout....It was just in this hallway....the quicker the better....I fear the rodents may know we are coming...
Hold it. Before we proceed, guns blazing, we'll need more star-shaped objects becaus-
Outta my way! I gotta get my soul back!
...To be fair, I'm not sure how exactly we're going to find any more star-shaped objects, anyway; Not unless Mirabilis has any more. Any more, SQUAWK!
Right, exactly.
(Who the hell is he talking to?)
*Sigh* Come on, Pico. Clearly, we're wasting our time here. Maybe we'll find some other lead on where BF is.
No way. I ain't leaving 'til I get my gun back.
(Oh, you've gotta be-) Fine, but after this we're going right back on the trail of BF; No more distractions.
You're coming with us. The only reason we're roped into this is because you stole my boyfriend, so now you owe us. And no funny business.
...That's it, I'm done.
Done with what?
You know EXACTLY what I mean. We've been here for exactly 9 months and found NOTHING about the Star Scepter, or its location. And all the while, Trio's been nowhere to be seen!
I don't suppose he didn't just quit, did he?
Maybe he did. Or maybe the universe decided that he'd get what was coming to him. Or MAYBE he's pulling a Regulus and is just hiding things out to strike when we least expect it. I don't know, and I don't care.
I mean, come on; In the time it's taking us to get NOWHERE in our preparation for Trio, a million other threats could be out there making themselves known.
Oh, please. Like what, exactly?
BETA MAN AND FRIENDS. WE HAVE BEEN TASKED WITH ASKING FOR YOUR ASSISTANCE WITH THE AGONY THREAT.
...Ok, so I was mostly saying that for the joke.
...I have had enough of all of this nonsense.
Take a look, reaper, upon the fixed timelines that YOU almost completely destroyed!
Everything you've done to try and mess with these people, to give them the false hope that "no, you won't die like every other version of yourself" or "fate isn't set in stone" or whatever, it was all for nothing, everything has been set on its correct path, as we always intended for it to be, Look! i'll even show you your Favourite heroes Just to get the point across!
And once I'm done with you, I'll see to it that you, and all your friends still here, get first hand experience as we tear this entire world apart, and build it up in our own image, Lets watch these together, shall we?
Well, i'll instead show you what happens when your precious jester boy gets torn to shre-
NO NO NO! This shouldn't be happening! everything was planned from the beginning to go our way! we even tried our machine on that world of recolours first! why isn't everyone dead?
You.
No matter, i'll just send her and her friend back to the depths of hell where they belong, wouldn't y-
You know, i think mighty really said it best when he referred to your plans as "Hardly the best effort", everything you've tried to do has just blown up in your face! and no ones buying your "moral high ground" thing at this point, Now then.
Pathetic delusions aside, you have put me and my friends through hell for the last...well, I've lost count at this point, Everything ends here, You'll never hurt ANYONE AGAIN!
Agony... That's the stuff Jazz and the others were talking about before we set off to find the Star Scepter, right? And what do you need us for?
YOUR OBJECTIVE: FIND AND GATHER ALL AGONY CREATURES AND BRING THEM TO LAVENDER TOWN. CAPTURE IF NECESSARY. PREFERRED METHOD: DIVIDE AND CONQUER.
In other words, you want us to increase your numbers so they could be split further and cover more ground. Got it.
So, just so we know how much of a hunt we're going on, how many Agony creatures are there?
ACCORDING TO https://docs.google.com/document/d/1UBN5E4PIvte-wNOT30Ak2Ewh6TAILwijHT3eabwR6iQ/edit, THERE ARE AT LEAST 148 DIFFERENT AGONY CREATURES. HOWEVER, SOURCE IS OUTDATED: THERE COULD BE MORE, AND SOME MAY HAVE TAKEN DIFFERENT FORMS UPON TERMINATION OF SOME OF THE ONES LISTED.
Oooooookay... That's close to 150, which is... a lot. And how many of those do you guys already have...?
CALCULATING...
...
...CURRENTLY, AN ESTIMATED 15 AGONY CREATURES ARE ACCOUNTED FOR.
So, only about a TENTH of these guys are already taken care of in some shape or form... Great.
I suppose that would be why Jazz and whoever else is with them wants bigger numbers. The question is, how would we even go about finding them?
UNFORTUNATELY, WE HAVE NO MEANS TO SUPPLY YOU WITH A METHOD TO LOCATE THOSE INFECTED WITH AGONY. THAT IS SOMETHING YOU MUST FIGURE OUT ON YOUR OWN.
Well, that's helpful.
Anyone here has any ideas...?
Oh, hey, Moto! Yeah, don't mind me; I'm only here on lunch break. After that, I'm going back to training.
Yeah, I know... But, there's a certain power I've been training hard to obtain...


...But while I've already gotten pretty good headway in learning Chivalry, for some reason- despite my mastery of Ultra Instinct- I cannot seem to get any sort of grip on Sei.

Yeah, I know.
I mean, I won't go into further details on the situation at hand out of respect, but I am aware of the true nature of why Trio's gone, as well as the likelihood of him coming back.
...Because, frankly... Trio's resurgence helped me realize something. Something I should've realized a long time ago.
For every villain we defeat, there is always bound to be a new one; That's just how things are. I already knew that much. But there will always be no telling if the next foe will be stronger than the last.
Forget the fact that Evil Mario is equal in power to the highest point in the hierarchy, barring Kirby's potential power; Because even if we faced something like THAT and make it through, there's more than likely going to be something stronger than even THAT. And even then, we won’t be able to rely on power moves like Beta Supremo or Issoro forever.
...Which is why I feel that it is important that I keep up with my training. So that I can be ready for whatever comes next.
...Once I’m done eating, I’m going to go back to try and learn Sei. Once I manage to do that, I’ll take a break.
Oh! i've seen one of these before...Mighty gave me one ages ago...
It's star shaped, maybe if i can....
Perhaps i can...Bait the leader away from the horde....And we can get our stuff back that way....
I dunno... If we go into this now, it'd be with as much of a plan as we had with the Star Scepter... if not less.
Maybe. But the Star Scepter is an ancient weapon that was lost a long, long time ago; I don't think these "Agony Creatures" are going to be any harder to find than someone who'd at least have a hint of where the Star Scepter may be.
Well, it's better than sitting around doing nothing. How should we go about this?
Well, the way I see it, we'll cover more ground if we go into groups: Beta, Ninja, Epsilon, and myself in one group, Beta Z, Ninja Z, and Sergeant Z in another, Both Bts and Ninja Ghost in a third, and then Lydian can go with Chase and Note.
Right. Someone should also inform Wraith, Walter, and HT that we're not searching for the Star Scepter for now; Whether or not they want to help us with the Agony stuff, it's up to them.
Tower's likely going to choose to deal with that problem of his* that he's been complaining about the entire time we've been here.
IN THAT CASE, CHASE AND NOTE MAY WISH TO COME WITH US.
Why...?
JAZZ HAS ALSO REQUESTED THAT WE TAKE YOU TO JAZZ HQ. THERE IS SOMETHING JAZZ WILL WISH TO GIVE YOU ONCE YOU GET THERE... ASSUMING IT IS ALREADY FINISHED.
...Ok...? So, then, perhaps we can ask him what else he knows about this Agony stuff there?
Perhaps while you're there, you can see if he could make us something to make tracking Agony Creatures easier?
Could be worth a shot.
Right. Let's move out, people.
Why... does stuff like this happen to me?
...
...You know what?
it.
...What, did you think we were just gonna walk?
...Wait, what the...?
Ha! Eat THAT, Miller!
You wot? I swear to God, you're cheating!
I believe there is someone at the door.
And you didn't let them in? Come on, man, that could've been the pizza!
Ugh, very well, I'll get it myself.
Well, there you are, br-
Oh. You're not him.
Gee, wonder what gave THAT away. I don't suppose you're here for the party, are you?
Not at all. ...I take it you're that rogue MK-X Droid Jazz was talking about?
That'd be me; Though, I wouldn't say that I am "rogue", per-se. I am Jazz Hands Reborn, but you may call me J-H.
Good to know. Is Jazz even here at all?
Wouldn't be throwing this party if he was.
Great. Then, that thing he wanted to give me...?
What, that thing? Eh, had it done an hour before that Agony Dinosaur attacked the place. Come on in, I'll have someone take you there.
Hey, Synth. Take Lydian here to that thing Jazz wants to give her, won't you?
Of course, sir.
This way, Miss Lydian.
I suppose you two also have a question or two to ask, right?
...I guess I can do my best to answer them.
Kid, you're making a lotta assumptions if you think me and Jazz keep each other updated on anything. I'd bet he only recently learned about my little "evolution".
...But, what I can do is tap into his memory files to find out what he's learned.
And since when the fuck can you do that?
Well, everyone in the Jazz Armada is actually connected to the same VPN, even the droids. However, Jazz's, Missingno.'s, Techno's, and Orchestra's are all password-protected to keep each other out of their own personal files.
...But me and Jazz used to be one in the same a long time ago; Bit of a long story. I know him well enough that I can easily crack the password. From there, I'll browse through his memory files and see what I can find out. You'll have to give me a minute, though.
...So, you're that "Jazz but not Jazz" that Ninja Ghost made, right?
Correct. I was originally designed as a combat robot, very identical to Jazz; However, my personality was reworked into that of a service robot so that I could serve him during his retirement... Up until he stepped out of retirement to become a hero, that is.
I see... And what about me? Has he thought about making a new version of me when he made you?
...No, I don't believe he ever considered a new "Lydian" unit.
I see... So, he really did forget all about me back then.
Does this upset you?
...Hm...
...Nah. I don't need some other version of myself, anyway; All those boys and their "ghosts" and "alternate universe counterparts" are already too much to wrap my head around as is.
I see. Well, that is good to know.
...In any case, we are here.
...He wanted to give me some kind of big contraption?
Not quite. If what J-H has told me before is true, Jazz actually had plans for an upgrade of your own, similar to his own; A "Lydian +", if you will. He believed that it would help you better to keep up with the rest of what this world may challenge you with.
...And assuming J-H has properly finished its construction, this machine should be able to apply those very upgrades to you without him or any other mechanic having to be here. It's just a matter of you stepping into the machine, and I insert the blueprints.
...Hm...
Well, a new look couldn't hurt, right? Let's get to it.
...Hm... Hm hm hm...
...Ok. I think I can summarize...
So, Agony is apparently the energy used by some cat demon who wants nothing but to make everyone suffer; Said demon's spirit cannot be destroyed, even by the Omni King, so they have to seal it away in some "Heaven's Jewel". But the demon was able to break free, and bring itself back with the energy known as Agony. The energy can apparently bring beings known as "Agony Creatures" to life; Whether they were inanimate objects, broken-down machines, manifestations of something in one's mind, or even those who were once dead. This power feeds on the suffering of others; The more negative feelings surround it, the stronger they become.
...Apparently, the only way to stop Agony for good is to seal the demon away with the Heaven's Jewel, once and for all. And to do so properly... They need all of the Agony creatures to be in one place. You guys do that, and it'll not only stop the demon... but the Agony as well.
...But once this is accomplished... Those Agony creatures won't be coming back. Not even those who can be considered as "good" will remain...
...All-in-all, for the greater good... Sacrifices WILL have to be made. No other way around it.
...Or, at least, from what I understand from Jazz's memories.
2849 Comments